Looking Forward To LIVING!

Before our split I used to think that Galen and I were meant to be together. I still believe that. What our union has contributed to the world is very powerful, two beautiful and brilliant beings whose existence has enhanced not only our lives but the world. Galen and I were destined to create. The thing about it though is that we were not meant to be together forever. There is someone else with whom I am destined to continue life's journey, and I'm okay with that. But I wasn't initially. Leaving was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. My heart was crushed. I had lost all faith in love. I'm over that now. I used to believe that love would make any and everything okay. I've realized that it's not quite so simple. There are a lot of facters that make a relationship successful and enduring. To sum it up I'll just say that the 'right' love is the main ingredient. The right love has a sincere and vested interest in your happiness and not just in their own. No doubt you must love yourself before you can love others. Without self-love, any love you attempt to give will be unhealthy. I thank God that I am no longer the giver or recipient of unhealthy love. I am looking forward to the partner that God will send my way. I'm not searching for it, or putting life on hold waiting for it, but I'm open to receive it. Having someone to come home to to enhance your happiness is a beautiful thing, it's love that is pimped out. I'm looking forward to some pimped out love and to all the people who will come into my life over the years and bless me with the experiences, lessons, and gifts they will leave behind. Every day I wake up thanking God for all the yesterdays and looking forward to living.

Commuting with Kiddies- Scene 1

Me: Driving down H Street
Angel: Coloring in the back seat
Phyre:Looking out the window

Angel: yelling "Mom! You made me mess up. You need to stop driving like that!"
Me: calmly "Who do you think you're talking to! You need to watch your mouth! The road is bumpy."
Angel: under her breath "You"
Phyre: gasps
Me: reaching back to smack Angel across her legs while driving
Me: noticing that it must not have hurt, as she kept right on coloring and never even looked up
Me: trying to save face "Next time I will make it hurt. You need to have respect!"
Angel: while still coloring and still not looking up "It did hurt mommy"
Phyre: to Angel "You really shouldn't have said that"

Moral of this story, go with your instinct . . . if you're going to spank, pull the car over, get out and make the spanking count! As much as I try to appeal to my children logically as to why certain things are right and others are wrong, sometimes you've got to take it back to basics and whoop that ass.

Poet Mode: Dear Love

Letter to The One I Love

Dear Love,

I'm writing this letter not to tell you how I feel
But to let you know the reasons why I know this love is real
It's not because you tell me so everyday, although you do
And it's not because you told me that you'd always be true
It's not because you pick me up when my spirits are blue
And I bet by this time you haven't a clue
You're wondering why aren't you?
If it's not because of all the sweet things that you say
Then how else do I know this love is here to stay?
Well it's not because you calm me when my mood is kinda bad
And it's not because you make me laugh even when I'm mad
Its not that you hold me tight and just right and are sensitive to my needs
It's because you do these things simply out of love for me
You don't have to love me and show it so well too
But you want to make me happy, and you do.

Thank you

Poet Mode: Perfect Reflections

At 30 years old I have learned to love my imperfections
Not to ever again grimace at the sight of my reflection
The way I am is exactly the way that God meant for me to be
All my imperfections are really exclamation marks of beauty

From the roots of my hair to the tips of my toes
From my half cocked grin to the curve of my nose
From the size of my boobs to the color of my skin
These things only accentuate my light that shines from within

If you don't like what you see when you look at me simply divert your gaze away
Because the beauty of my smile just may make another persons day
If the sway of my hips is not to your liking, oh well, so what
Because I guarantee that someone else loves looking at my butt

Besides all that, what really counts is how much I love what I see
And you will never know the joy I feel over just being me
Just thinking of me puts a smile on my face that no other could evoke
Imagining myself as someone else makes me gag and choke

Don't get me wrong, I'm a work in progress, always striving for that perfection
But before you can truly improve your mind body and soul you must love the current reflection

Warrior Princess

I used to be seriously obsessed with the show Xena:Warrior Princess. She was the shit for real, beautiful, seductive, feminine . . . but could kick your whole crews ass in a quick minute, all at once! To this day, Xena is my Shero/Idol, lol. I'm beautiful, seductive (when I wanna be), feminine (somewhat, can't seem to shake the tomboy thing though), but I will get DC ghetto on your ass in a heartbeat so don't get it twisted.

And to my friends who didn't know, well now you do, so hook me up with the series DVD for christmas!

LOL

The Please Don'ts for Summer - Part 1

You tend to see a lot of atrocities when catching the train and/or bus back and forth from the suburbs to downtown DC everyday, but nothing brings out the NO's more than summer. I'm talkin about the 'No she didn't"s the "No that's not what I think it is" the "Oh No's" and the "Hell No's". I have vowed to jot down a note for every Hell No I spot so that I can remember and share, but for now here is a simmered down list of ten summer Don'ts from my mind to you . . .


Number 1: Ladies, Ladies, Ladies, if you are sporting a jungle or even noticeable fuzz in the armpit area, DO NOT WEAR A SLEEVELESS SHIRT, especially when there is a chance that you might have to stand up on the Metro and reach for the high support rail, the innocent bystanders within bird's eye view of your hairyness do not deserve this.

Number 2: Please remember that white pants are not for everyone, or atleast certain white fabrics aren't. I really feel bad that no one informed you that white + sun =see-thru, as in we can see your cellulite, stretch marks and blemishes thru your pants. Next time, please skip the Rave or Ashley Stewart sale rack and go for a good pair made of a good fabric that is also lined. Also, it's advisable to wear nude (skin toned) undies instead of hot pink, okay, same for shirts.

Number 3: Even though you are considered on the slender side because your frame is somewhat petite, that does not mean that you are automatically entitled to bare your belly in a half shirt. Your arms, thighs and butt may still be small, but your big ass, 4 c-section having, stretch mark scarred belly looks like it's been put through a meat grinder, just hanging there and jiggeling under your shirt, please put it away, it's making me sick just thinking about it.

Number 4: When your flip-flops have sprung a leak and gone flat, it's time to toss them and invest $4.99 in a new pair. Leaning flip-flops, good lawd, need I say more.

Number 5: I understand that we all can't have perfect feet, some of us take them thru a heck of a lot, me included, but if you got a corn on every toe and deep ridges of dead cracked skin lining your heels, strappy gladiator sandals might not be the best way to showcase that. Buy a foot scraper from CVS for $2.99 and some medicated corn pads and go home and get to work.

Number 6: Sheer deodarant was a miracle invention that you can purchase anywhere in any brand and scent, please invest, white deodorant stains are so tacky.

Number 7: Speaking of deodorant, please use it. Also, if you haven't figured it out already, you might need to switch brands or scents when summer rolls around. Sometimes the brand that kept us dry and must-free in winter does not perform the same way in summer. Go ahead, try something new, sooner please rather than later.

Number 8: This one is not specific to summer, but has been spotted often enough lately that I am compelled to give it special mention . . . female + mustache = NO. I'm not quite sure where in the world or who in their right mind finds this carnival freak show act attractive, but . . .

Number 9: This is a little petty, but black sandals do not go with everything. If you have on brown bottoms with a white or grey or any neutral colored shirt, you kinda need to pair that with brown or neutral colored footwear. Um, I don't know how else to explain . . .

Number 10: Last but not least, another special mention. Again, this is not specific to summer but I spotted this today and I really wanted to get off the bus to let this women know. Dear lady, It's great that you were getting your exercise on, power walking in your bike shorts and tank top, you were doing it, more power! The only thing is, if you've had that pair of workout shorts for awhile, you might just want to check the seems before slipping them on and hitting the pavement. Sweetie, I am so sorry to inform you that you had a big fat split, as in hole, right in the ass crack of your bike shorts. I even heard one person gasp 'oh no' as the bus crept by.

You Know You're From DC When . . . and DC Ebonics Dictionary

Someone posted this in one of my myspace friends comments section and I loved, and ID'd, with it so much that I had to 'bite' (means borrow/use for those who don't know) it and post it here.


*~*~THE DC/METRO AREA EBONICS DICTIONARY:~*~*
ASS'D OUT - to be left hanging, stood up: "Man, we was sposed to meetat the library but he left me ass'd out!"
BAMMA - a person who is not very trendy, whether it be fashion ormusic: "Ugh! Look at his shape-up...and his beat-up Pro Wings. Hes sucha bamma"
BLOWN - very upset/disappointed
BOOSTED - to be excited, proud: "He was so boosted when he found out hegot an A on his history test"
BUN - v. to make one a steady girl/boyfriend: "She's the completepackage; looks, smarts and she cool to be around. i had to bun her" n.a pretty girl/boy: "I was looking at ur sister yesterday, and I didntrealize but, she's a bun"
CARRY - to disrespect someone: "Jimmy tried to holla at Crystal , butshe carried him by walking away"
CHILL MODE - calm, collected: "Afterschool, I just be on chill mode,dawg"
CRUSH - to consume speedily or with vigor; or to defeat handily (seePUNISH): "Those Steakums were bomb, man we crushed them joints"
GET YOUR MAN - have success, whether with a girl or in sports. Refersto competitive situations: "Ima get my man today. We gonna punishSuitland "
GUMP - a nerd and/or wimp: "I dared him to touch her butt, but he agump"JAH, JI -kinda/sorta or very, depending on emphasis: "She is jah phat"
JONING - making fun of another person: "Did u see that dudes shape-up?They was joning at the lunch table all period"
KIRK (v. to KIRK OUT) - to get very mad, or excited beyond ones normalrange: "If the teacher wasnt there, he woulda kirked on that dude"
LUNCHING - joking around, acting foolishly: "During my free periods, wejust be walking around or straight lunching, cuz we be bored"
NO BULL,BULLSH*T, B-SH*T- to mean something truthful; equivalent to "Imtelling the truth": "Man, thats exactly what happened. No bull"
OVERCOMPENSATE - to do more than is nessacary in a given situation byshowing off: "I mean, i know its hot but stop overcompensating man, putyour shirt back on"
PRESSED - to be annoying, conceited: "He was so pressed to showeveryone he got an A; he gets on my nerves"
PUNISH - to dispense with readily, to handle easily; deals with sexualintercourse when used in reference to girls
ROCK - to wear or sport. "You need to gimme back my damn AJA IMANIheadband so i can rock it with this shirt I got to match"
SACK CHASER (ie Golddigger)- A woman who is only interested in a manfor his money
SHORT - unfortunate: "I cant give u a ride, young. either ask Chris oru short"
SICE - to over exaggerate: "Tamika not even that tight Isaac Ji Sicedher.SLAM - directly: "He wasn't looking and the ball hit him slam in thehead"
SLUMP - to knock down and/or out with extreme force. "Dog, you keepf*ckin around with girl like that and imma have to slump your wackass."
SMASH - have sexual intercourse: "Ima ja blown cuz I went over herhouse, and her parents were there, so I couldnt smash"SON-SON - same as "dawg" and "dogg", but normally someone younger:"Young, dont talk about Jason. Thats my son-son"
STEAL - to punch, assault someone: "Young, if u dont get out my face,Ima steal u slam in ur jaw"
STOUT - A very attractive male or female in both the face and body.
TIP DRILL - A woman or man who is only attractive from the neck down.
WACK - unfavorable, uncool, unpoplar or very loser-like. 1. "What iswith this wack-ass grade you gave me? i got all the right answers andyou still gave me a 'D', man" 2. "Do you know how wack you look rightnow? If I ever see you wear those highwater jeans and small-ass t-shirtagain....."
YOUNG, JOE - equivalent to "son" or "kid" in NY; similar to "yo" also:"Young, Im sick of school" or "Chill out joe, It aint even thatserious".


U KNO U 4ROM DC WHEN . . .
1. you know what mumbo sauce is and order it with chicken/fries 2. you know of hobo, shooters, solbiato,alldaz, bonidacci, we r one, madness, 3. you take professional photos at Iverson mall 4. you miss crystal skate 5. you know what a cranker is 6. you know byb is the best gogo band of all times 7. keep it gangsta is your anthem 8. you used to hang out at union station 9. getting fried for you is a hobby 10. you get hyped when they finally play a gogo song at parties 11. the ladies are sexy in rainbow colors ?? 12. your favorite car is a Crown vic or Cadi 13. you listen to 95.5 and 93.9 14. you dont claim Baltimore 15. you think rayne and flex are neighborhood celebrities 16. you were boosted that rare essence was on mtv 17. you know what boosted means 18. you think most songs sound better with a gogo beat 19. you know what it means to kirk out 20. the ladies hang out with more males than females 21. you refer to the subway as the metro 22. you know how to get everywhere on the metro 23. you remember them closing balou/cardozo a thousand times cause people kept leaving mercury in it 24. you know what it means to be wrapping somebody up 25. you think nike boots go with everything 26. you buy earrings from the beauty supply store 27. you know who chuck brown is 28. you can finish this statement: Three in the morning 29. you see people camped outside of shoe stores when the new shipment of jordans comes in 30. you shop at urbans and think white people clothes are cummin up 31. when you get upset, you are blown 32. when a person starts acting crazy, they are lunchin or loafin 33. after a party, you think about going to IHOP 34. if something dramatic occurs, it is crucial or tuff 35. if you agree with something that was said, you say no bull shit or I know right 36. you insert (ja like) randomly in sentences and dont have a clue as to what it mean ex: I was ja like upset 37. u have a clue as to what beatin yea feet is 38. you beat your feet 39. you no wat it mean 2 wreck 40. all u need is ya fitted, north face and nike boots and u fresh. 41. You kno berry farms in SE isn't a real farm. 42.You walk around playing nextel ringtones 43.You talk to a gurl and u say:Im trying 2 beat da joint! 44.U Be Fakin like!! Is really used 45.U refer everyone as "young" or "mo" or '' son'' 46.If u use bamma in a sentence 47.if a hoe, is a "roller" 48.if u know wat smacked means 49.when everybody name is Joe 50.you see snow and still got to get your ass up cus dcps dont care bout you bussen your ass. 51.cigarettes are called jacks 52. 2 hour delay in 6 feet snow 53.nobody calls ramen noodles "ramen noodles" 54.you love the X2 bus even tho you know its the hardest jont runnin 55. almost every dude has dreds 56. if you know Willy Wonka had the Factory and we got the City